Tag Archives: trash talking


24 Aug


I’d like to thank the Academy. My brilliant fellow bloggers. The development team at OkCupid. The relentless support of my friends and family.
This is for all of you who told me to put down the Doritos and get dressed for my date already. The hot new dress that successfully converted dates 3 and 4 to repeats. The diner down the street that nurses my hangover while getting the full morning-after download. The readers who think this shit is funny.
Thank you all. I wouldn’t be here without you.


>Rain Delay

22 Aug

>The Sundate always sounds like a good idea when you plan it.

Don’t waste a perfectly good Friday or Saturday outing on what may or may not be a successful date. And there’s something about weekend dates that makes boys that much more aggressive. I know you don’t have work tomorrow, neither do I. But that doesn’t mean I’m going home with you.

Also, we’re not trying to look desperate here. I mean, our Saturday nights are booked through November. (Read: ate entire bag of popcorn while streaming Netflix on my couch last night.)

I, however, have just cancelled my second Sundate in a row. I’m blaming half on what’s clearly an official Rain Delay (hair’s looking rough), and the other half on the realization that I don’t want to get all made up, take a cab in the rain, and meet you on the Lower East Side for a drink at 9pm. 9pm! That’s, like, an hour from bedtime!
Instead, I come in from the rain, bypass the huge presentation I’m supposed to be preparing for tomorrow, bypass the scheduled run in the park (thank you, rain), and blog.
Kudos to KG for completing her second official Sundate. I’m 0 for 2.
That said, I’m 3-4, and rescheduled Date #4 for tomorrow night. Get the champagne flutes ready at the finish line…

>Numba 3

19 Aug

>Going on date #3 in t-10 minutes, bitches! It’s with Midwestern Man. KT, it’s going to be a close call…

Will update with the deets as soon as I return.

>Eat, Pray, Post

19 Aug


Two of those three things now consume 93 percent of my weekly routine.
The other 7 percent? Dating.
Off balance, you say?
Oh hellllsno.
Because despite the recent breakup and subsequent date exhaustion, I’m boutsta pass y’all on the way to the finish line. See: woman in white.
That’s right, I’ve got two dates lined up this weekend. And this time I’ve learned to space those babies out so I can adequately nurse hangover from Date #3 before jumping all cute into Date #4.
So pick up the pace and mark your calendars for Monday. If I’m lucky, I’ll be crossing that finish line and doing a few laps on the repeats leaderboard while I wait for you suckas.
%d bloggers like this: