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Blind dating: not as trashy as Roger Lodge would have you believe

19 Feb

First date of the V-day Challenge. Check. First blind date. Check. First sober date. Check.

My friend set me up with her friend’s younger brother who (for reasons unbeknownst to her) has been perpetually single for a while. It was a for real blind date. As in, I had not seen any pictures of this dude nor was I given any physical descriptors. My friend had met him once a few years ago, yet she could not conjure up a mental image of him, instead telling me, “I just remember him being funny.” Funny’s good, don’t get me wrong, but strictly deferring to homeboy’s personality isn’t so good, right?

Well me and Funny Man exchanged a few emails. And yes, he did seem funny, at least electronically. We ended up getting coffee in Park Slope and walked around the neighborhood. He was friendly. He was chatty. He was funny. Not awkward in the least bit. But no sparks flying. Pretty sure the feeling was mutual, given that I have not heard from him since. Also, the date lasted about an hour in its entirety, probs qualifying it as the shortest date ever on SixteenDates, or simply the shortest date ever.

Regardless, I feel this was the perfect date to kick off the first challenge. I’d like to think Roger Lodge and his blazers would keep this date out of the Hall of Shame. I mean, there was no snot flying around or awkwardly-timed public kisses, which keeps me (somewhat) hopeful for the upcoming men of future challenges. Howevs, my standards appear to be somewhat lowered. Now onto finding date numba 2…

Creeper/Keeper Rating = 6  (1-10 scale)

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The Blog. Two point OOOOOH snap.

16 Feb

We got a little obsessed with the blog. After two months, we had a slew of stories, significantly less healthy livers, and a few free meals. Aka a feeling of accomplishment.

And then like any good New Years resolution, we stopped paying attention and went back to our REAL lives.

We took a little bit of a hiatus from dating, blogging, and blogging about dating. From going to the gym, incessantly group texting each other and putting “pilates” on our calendar to make ourselves feel proactive.

Like any good Destiny’s Child comeback, the cast of characters has changed a bit, despite the fact that we are still looking for some mens who can pay the bills bills bills.

We are back for version 2, but have to acknowledge that a lot has happened while we were on a break…

KT dated a meat man, who turned out to be in a potentially dangerous killer. Homegirl don’t play that. She got a hickey (yes my friends, over the age of 12, and not on a date). And was most recently seen taking over the DJ’s booth on her birthday to play “H to the izzo.”

KP ditched the boy who’s real name was a verb. Dated a guy who told her he wanted to start following the Lord, which meant no sex til marriage. Riiiiiight. She is currently getting some hook-up action from Latin Lover (who isn’t on the Lord’s side) and has been on a few dates with an Okcupid guy who seems too good to be true. Maybe this one’s more successful since homegirl ain’t giving the goods out just yet.

KG went and got herself a man (say whaaaa??). Lucky date numba 2 went from blog to boyfriend. And since it’s her first time having one of those thangs, the stories of getting to BF/GF status and what to do with it has been a comedy of errors.

So along with new posts, we have to throw in some FLASHBACKS so that you can catch up on all the amazing awkwardness that has brought us to present day. We’ve had five months to recover from the first round and although waking up in a bed of mozzarella sticks is a delight, we need to get our game faces back on.

I mean, even Sisterhood of the Traveling pants got a sequel. *

* to our readers who actually have seen said sequel more than once, lets call them “Taylor,” we are not discrediting your movie choices, just saying that magically expanding denim can’t get more action than the ladies of the blog.

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