>Date Report: Weekend 2

25 Jul

>Let me go ahead and say there is no date report.

I had no dates this weekend.

You want lame excuses? It was hot. The kind of hot where you walk five blocks, hop in Duane Reade to get water, realize that you smell like a sweaty homeless person, hop over to Sephora and throw on some perfume, then apologize profusely when you’re 10 minutes late for the movie.

But I did make some progress in the AC. Highlights below:

1. Got a few lines out on Okcupid and HowAboutWe. OkCu, I will take back all the bad things I said about you if you will just follow through on this one cutie. Give me one date, and I’m sure he’ll fall in love with me and we’ll get married and make little babies and live happily ever after.

In other online news, dude on HowAboutWe wants to go on a road trip. I’m like, HowAboutWe meet first!!? Creepster.

And if you needed another red flag, he offered what is the scariest word in my date vocabulary: CAMPING. [Shivers.]

2. Gave the meat man my email and digits. I mean, it was for the restaurant’s mailing list, but he asked for it. Oh, and he gave me more free food and flirty winks. The looming question: does he think I’m fat or cute?

3. Date 5 with my 37yo lover is on Tuesday. Leaving the details out of this because a. I actually really do like this kid, and b. it doesn’t count for our sixteendates.

Ok, now I need to go run off these 3lbs of meat I just ate. Oh, the things you’ll do for love.

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