>
>I’m not one to judge looks (sort of a lie), but when it comes to spelling and grammar, I have standards.
>Remember when you usta call in to the radio station after 10pm and give your shout outs (which until a few years ago I actually thought were shot outs)?
>I was just stuck underground for 56 minutes. On a train. Without AC.
Let me repeat, smelly peeps, 20 blocks, 56 minutes. A one-legged turtle could carry me faster — with laptop in bag.
You might think I was ready to kill a kitten, because that’s how us New Yorkers roll.
But alas, handsome man to the rescue.
>Finish my sweaty sesh at hot yoga tonight, which just so happens to be across the street.
>Food or sex?
>It didn’t take you long to realize the new tenant across the way lives by herself. And often likes to be, shall we say, free.
>Ok, I know this doesn’t fit anywhere on the blizzog, but this is just too good not to share.
>You thought the speed dating prospects were shoddy, I’m sitting here in a sea of old molely people, pimpled teens, and botoxed moms.
Such is the clientele of a dermatologist’s office. On the Upper East Side.
And yes, I’m blogging from the waiting room for three reasons:
1. Any event that requires me to wear non-period underwear and shave my legs deserves a post.
2. Any time not at the office is spent thinking about potential dates.
3. A man is about to put on some binoculars and stare my body up and down.
Don’t lie, you’re totes jeal.
>
>Ok, looks like I’m climbing my way up the breakup leaderboard. (Breakup #1 will live in SD infamy.)
>Dear Date #3,
>
>Ok, KP and I had a mini-intervention with CFH last night. And by mini-intervention I mean lots of drinks.